Captain Fantastic: A Reflection on our Future Generations to the realities of Death and Closure

It is not very often do I laugh in film. Mainly, I believe it is because what is broadcasted mainstream is often correlated to the extreme ideologies and insensitivities, such those exhibited by certain Trump supporters, we are so many are terrified of.  From breasts and genitalia to mocking other cultures, races, or genders, this content most often never provides a method which allows us to critically think about the societies around us in the real world.

Captain Fantastic was an incredible roller coaster Viggo Mortensen’s Captain Fantastic took me on. I do not think I have ever laughed so uncontrollably to the point of crying (believe the last similar experience was ‘Alive Inside’). It definitely tapped into feelings, values, understandings, and experiences, and it definitely was empowering to know others are challenging our stagnant realities. From funerals and closure, education and critical thinking, parenting and honesty, and the to understanding has happened through the choices in urbanization and understanding modern agricultural practices

Almost everyone will experience being a parent, babysitter or (unknowingly or not) a role model to the youth we shape around us. Our society, preoccupied with censorship, seems to have a very hard time giving honest answers to children. Death and sex are one of the major contenders of lack of honesty. But aren't those some of the most difficult conversations for us to have, because we couldn't find the confidence to. But what if we were honest and reduce the stress and hype to begin with? One of the key goals of parenting is to provide a safe space for children to come to you for answers and support. Who are you really protecting when you’re not providing information they will inevitably confront? Wouldn’t you rather it come from you than someone or something else that may not have the same consideration for them? Whether it be about how a baby is conceived to mental illness, child developmental psychologists lead that it is the parents and those around them that teach children to be deal with stress by being dishonest and to lie. What is really aiding the cousins at the dinner table about not just being honest what happened to their aunt. Suicide is a hard reality so why not benefit our children for being aware of the signs and the realities of countering unhappiness. Mother Meg Rosoff gives personal insight on how You can’t protect children by lying to them - the truth will hurt less. Like when the youngest asks about sex and rape, the father is honest and matter-of-fact about the differences it is consensual for pleasure, procreation, while the other be degrading and disrespectful. The child cringed, not because she was scared, but because she was educated and aware of good and bad behaviours.

Education is to be a tool to understanding, but what is its purpose if we are not using it to its full potential? Two main scenes stand out to me in the film when the father is pushing the daughter to think more critically, and encouraging her to go beyond the synopsis, rather towards her personal feelings of reading Lolita. More specifically, the point was proven after a parental debate on the effectiveness and capability of father’s home-schooling over public education. The teenage boys could hardly convey what the the country’s Bill of Rights was, while the eight year old girl not only versed out but could independently explain the fundamental importance of upholding basic human rights. Education must be about nourishing children’s understanding of facts beyond memorization. We treat and educate children like we assume children cannot think critically for themselves but in fact it is us holding them back from reaching their potential. Sir Ken Robinson who throughout his career, has dedicated to ensure youth are growing up towards their potential, whatever form of education parents choose, that currently:
Do schools kill creativity : “Our education system has mined our minds in the way that we strip-mine the earth: for a particular commodity. And for the future, it won't serve us. We have to rethink the fundamental principles on which we're educating our children.” What he is describing, is education that originates for the purpose of feeding the Industrial Age that feeds consumerism and the challenges we face today of blind exploitation. Like the education the father has given to his children, will greatly exceed the money of academics. They will most definitely be the leaders and initiators for sustainable living. As Ken Robinson concludes, “The only way we'll do it is by seeing our creative capacities for the richness they are and seeing our children for the hope that they are. And our task is to educate their whole being, so they can face this future. By the way -- we may not see this future, but they will. And our job is to help them make something of it.” We all want the best for our children.

One of the major in-your-face eye-openers was at the very beginning when the family worked together to kill and gut a deer for meat. Forget the most violent human - to - human violence, instead I hear a great cringe from the audience. The volume of violence on our screens is definitely  messing with our psychies on the emotions that truly matter. Funny enough, seeing the respect and care they took towards the animal, over the processes promoted by superstores, I can relate. It is because I've done it myself, growing up in an environment where my parents, frustrated over continuously contending with the moral of the meat we wanted to eat that  was not raised or treated well, decided to do it ourselves, even when it is emotionally difficult to do the act of killing.

My experiences growing up raising produce and animals on a hobby farm

Having left that environment and stepped into urban life, I have began to see the hypocrisies of opinions over animals and food. I have had into adulthood, people shocked and horrified that we raise and butcher ourselves, while they are completely in support of eating their McDonald's burger. So why not shame the acts of violence and disrespect over shaming the complete intake of a particular animal? Often those who have never lived out of the comforts of their kind of society, for example Western North America, find it hard to grapple with mindfulness in respecting cultural sensitivity and diversity,  or making the distinction of viewing animals other than pets.Given the encouragement to think critically about our consumption and impact, we have the power of clearheaded choice. Much like this 11-year old boy motivated to come on TED Talk on What’s wrong with our food system, the children of this film were encouraged with the necessary awareness to be the next generations to a sustainable society that is no longer solely dictated by business.

Another lovely topic the film brings up is that of what happens after a loved one dies. Do all parts of family respect the wishes of the deceased despite differences in personal views? How about setting personal views of others aside, so to work together from the common struggles of dealing loss and healing? The film confronts not only the harsh realities currently in our societies who lack the respect of either the deceased and family choices, but also the methods we go about in hopes of finding a sense of closure. Focus their efforts to the Psychology of Death and Dying as Kubler-Ross, we are beginning to understand the  stress and human dissatisfaction that has come from businesses preying on those who are most vulnerable, promising closure, and leaving people with massive death debts, while it was not the wishes of the deceased in the first place. Let wills and respecting wishes be the family's process of healing and even learning more about this loved one, by respecting their loved ones freedom of choice one last time. The second theme found in the film,  is the importance of following through with an effective process of grieving, which is inevitably following what the loved one asked to be done. The father and kids would have had an unbearable and family-breaking result, if they had not had the safe space to express how they felt from the loss. In their case, they did not feel that there was respect from the parents of their daughter wanted; to not have a funeral in a church, to be cremated and have her remains flushed down the toilet. Moreover, it is a reminder that you have to really be part of the process to achieve personal healing. Just look at the power of music for this. In a TED Talk, Nancy Burns discusses going Beyond Closure, concluding, "We live in a culture that tells us to be happy all the time. Sometimes, life sucks, bad things happen. Knowing that joy and grief can be held together is so important, because it’s a long journey without the possibility of joy."

Moreover an aerospace engineer once told me that “Joy and grief are BOTH necessary. Experiencing one without enough of the other devalues both. If things are going too smooth, there's a good chance you aren't going anywhere. In the same way, if things are too rough, you won’t be going anywhere either. Suitable perturbations are necessary to move forward or change paths: be it in life, or in physics (yay Newton!)”. Other works please see The Final Frontier

Films like Captain Fantastic are excellent reminders and providers of empathy. There is no superhero as no one is perfect, but there is something pretty super in the ability to apologize and say you’re sorry. Even if it was not one that tickled your fancy, it helps to understand others’ point of view, and to see where we can meet the common ground of values and needs.

 

SEE ALSO:

Canadians for a Sustainable Society #SustainableCND

Born to lie - CBC Ideas
Snapshot of Different Learning in the Classroom
Man's Search for Meaning - Viktor Frankl

#empathyandequalitymatters